When you have a chronic illness, it is almost inevitable that you will have bad mental health days. Constantly battling with pain, not feeling like you and having what you do be dictated by your health makes it a breeding ground for having
The majority of photos I post on social media don’t accurately depict the bad days. Like the one above; I’m smiling and look healthy. But that’s invisible illnesses for you; I nearly always look healthy, even on the days I can hardly walk.
Last week, I posted an Instagram where I admitted that I’m struggling at the moment. I was having a tough week of pain and generally just sick of being sick.
I don’t really post when I’m having bad days; not because I don’t want to share it BUT more because I have no energy to do that.
Lets get real though; having a chronic illness is hard and on those days/weeks/months where your health seems to be kicking your arse it’s hard to be positive about it.
When you don’t feel good enough, your mind is constantly berating you telling you you’re rubbish and not achieving, when the constant pain just gets too much and you feel like you can’t do anything.
But it’s okay. We all get those days. They’re nothing to be ashamed of. The important thing is to not let the negative thought pattern stay with you.
How to get out of the negative thought pattern
Getting out of the negative thought pattern is easier said than done sometimes. But, the first thing is realising that they are there. By admitting they’re there and facing them, you’re over that first hurdle.
Someone told me something which I really valued when I was struggling last week; Don’t think of your decision as permanent. I had to make the really tough decision of stopping dancing for a while because my arthritis is getting worse and I don’t want to do more damage. But hearing that small piece of advice made it a lot easier and made me feel so much better.
Most chronic illnesses fluctuate. Realising that a decision you make when your flaring doesn’t have to be permanent can really help in those darker times.
Talk to someone about how your feeling. Whether that’s a family member (my mum is normally my go to), friends, doctor/nurse or a therapist. Being about to talk about why you feel like crap and let that negativity out can be really healthy and help you move on from that thought space.
I know this is something I need to get better with. I have some really close friends who always tell me to talk to them when I’m feeling this way rather than bottle it up! They’re right though – if you say out loud how your feeling and
This was a HUGE thing I learnt when I went to CBT was that a lot of my negative, anxious thoughts were irrational. I mean, I knew that before I went, but having to explain the thought process out loud made SUCH A DIFFERENCE and I suddenly saw that I didn’t have to think that way.
If one of the reasons you’re having these negative thought patterns is because you’re in a flare up or your symptoms are worsening, try to get an appointment with your specialist. (note to future Katie to actually do this!)
Your doctors need to track your symptoms and side effects to make sure you’re on the right treatments. I know the ball ache that is trying to get hold of specialists. My biggest piece of advice is to go through the specialist nurses as they can often slot you in for appointments. I know that this was the only way to see the gastro team – I was on the phone weekly to my IBD nurse when I was flaring!
I hate trying to get through to the hospital as I always feel like I’m overthinking and wasting people’s time. But you’re not. This service is there to HELP YOU and it’s so important you get the right treatments.
One thing to remember when you’re having those bad days is that social media is a highlight reel. It may look like everyone around you is having the time of there lives, maybe they are, but most people only show the good days. Those instagrammable moments which are just a snippet of their actual lives.
Resources for if you’re struggling with your mental health
If you do feel like your mental health is struggling more long term, it’s important to get the right help. Some fantastic organisations are;
Don’t forget to sign up to the Chronically Living newsletter which is relaunching Sunday 19th May 2019 and get a FREE spoonie checklist to help you on the bad days!
Don’t forget to leave your advice in the comments below on how you cope with negative thought patterns and your chronic illness.
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